THINGS

hannibalthecanibal:

and here we have harry potter literally standing on a pile of letters to try and catch one that is still in the air. there are clearly reasons why he doesn’t get sorted into ravenclaw

(via egberts)

guccier:

being single is like a vacuum cleaner, its sucks when you’re turned on

(via cwsl)

dirtyalec:

sometimes I close my eyes and I can’t see

(via cwsl)

ashketchurn:

i put the sad in quesadilla

(via egberts)

SOMETIMES I’M READING AND THEN I REALIZE THAT I’M JUST LOOKING AT WORDS AND IT’S TELLING ME A COOL STORY AND THEN I TRIP OUT AND IT TAKES ME A COUPLE MINUTES TO GET BACK INTO MY READING GROOVE

corsorala:

goes to unfollow u

sees ur tagged/me

u safe 4 now

(Source: masturbuddy, via chefboyardeezie)

snapchatting:

you are under arrest for being attractive and ruining my life

(via chefboyardeezie)

hungarian:

it’d be cool to speak like 20 different languages & keep it a secret from everyone & then during a time of crisis, u could speak some fluent russian to some russian guy holding a gun to your head & all your friends will be like daaamn

(Source: yokoohnoudidnt, via enflamed-asshole)

anglosexual:

misandryinhaiku:

“women are weaklings!”

i’m strong enough to carry

your corpse to the woods

this haiku is my favorite haiku

(via wizardtentacles)

dumpsterfetus:

art

(Source: tontoneti, via ewoqs)

I stopped by the kitchen on the way to bed, and there was a tray of mac and cheese sitting on the stove
Mac and cheese for dinner tomorrow
So excited

brandnewswastikas:

I like it when a girl has a food stain on her shirt because it means that she’s bad with spoons and will probably need me to feed her and I’m good with spoons so it will give me a chance to show off a little. 

(via fasterfood)

dooblerdoo:

whenever I create a text post

(via hannahsneakers)

(Source: fuckslutena, via ewoqs)